Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Why I couldn't be a criminal.

So I watch a lot of crime/cop shows, Law and Order: SVU, Criminal Minds, CSI:, CSI: New York, Cold Case (sometimes), and Medium, yeah a lot. And I've come to realize that if I ever wanted to take up a life of crime, it just wouldn't work it for me.

1. I'm not intimidating looking at all.

2. I'm a horrible liar. So if I was interrogated I'd probably admit my guilt.

3. My hair sheds like crazy so most likely it would end up all over the crime scene and bam, they got me.

4. My hair is also huge and curly and easy to spot, ie I wouldn't blend in.

5. The sight of blood sort of grosses me out.

6. I drive like a grandma most of the time (so I could never be the getaway driver).

7. I'm pretty weak, so I wouldn't be any use knocking down doors or breaking windows.

8. Most likely I'd start sneezing in the middle of a break in and totally give myself away.

9. I shuffle my feet, which is loud and also makes me a slow walker, not very efficient in a life of crime.

10. If Elliot Stabler showed up on the scene I'd give myself up in no time, I mean how could I not He's Elliot Stabler!


oh yes, you can arrest me, haha.


So why couldn't you be a criminal? Or could you?




happy wednesday!

29 comments:

Doni said...

I've been told I'm super easy to read aka have absolutely NO poker face. So... yeah, I don't think I'd be able to get away with anything.

The Novelista Barista said...

LOL i love him!
i could never bc id totally get caught!

alexa - cleveland's a plum said...

i'm a horrible liar. horrible. you can read my mood and face expressions like whoa.

it's ridiculous.

also, i don't like to be mean or steal things.

yeah i think i'd suck at it.

Lacey Bean said...

I <3 SVU!!!

Cafe Pasadena said...

Now, I know why I thought you might have a law enforcement/crime background.

Court said...

LOL! You are too funny!

heidikins said...

I actually *want* to be a criminal if that means that some super hawt FBI agent would interrogate me....hello, David Boreanaz! Swoon!

xox

LiLu said...

So you're saying I need to straighten my hair if I want to be a criminal?

Duly noted.

Julie Q said...

it is very good to know someone sheds as much as I do!!!!!! lol

Hillary said...

I'd be a pretty horrible criminal. First of all, I'm lazy and being a criminal sounds like a lot of work. I'd be good at the planning stages but when it comes to the follow-through, I really can't be bothered. Also, I shed a lot of hair. And I don't like to wear gloves so my fingerprints would be everywhere.

sarahdotcom said...

heehee. you are SO adorable.

i never thought about the shedding thing. like you, that would completely bust me.

Blicious said...

hah! cute post! i wear my heart on me sleeve. there is no way i could be. unless i caught a girl going after my man. HAHAHA

xoxo

Ali said...

Sigh...Stabler...

Mrs Soup said...

Mmmm...Stabler....he can arrest me! Oh, and so can Tutuola. Fin is yummy!

I have such a glass face, I am a horrible liar. And I'm so tall, it would be easy to pick me out...and I have bad body parts, so that never works out well when running or hiding.

I'll stick with watching them on TV.

Rachel said...

I swear I lose half of my hair a day! I shed terribly!

I also am a terrible liar. And I giggle a lot. In all situations. ALL. I'm what you would call an "inappropriate laugher." :P

Devorah said...

I think it's wrong to commit a crime. That's all. That's why I can't be a criminal lol...
Glad you are so honest with yourself - gr8 post!

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Andhari said...

You're so lovely you shouldn't be a criminal :)

weezermonkey said...

I would be a fantastic criminal.

I could tell you why, but then I'd have to kill you.

Auburn Kat said...

I'm awful at lying too and my hair sheds like CRAZY!

Angela Noelle said...

Ha, you are so funny! I don't think I would make a good criminal, but I have a strange penchant for trying to figure out how I *would* commit crimes if I were that sort of person. I'm kind of a messed up person, hee!

Bayjb said...

Sadly, I am a good liar, but the hair shedding thing is pretty ridiculous. They would catch me in a minute

Jill Pilgrim said...

I am a criminal.

Wait. I've said too much.

Luna Moon said...

I'd be an okay criminal. I could do the plotting well, and I blend in well enough. My only distinct feature is being kind of short.

I couldn't kill or hurt anyone. Unless it was a guy who deserved a kick in the balls, but that's about it. I'd have to be a con artist or something. Maybe a jewel thief.

Playful Professional said...

I could definitely be a criminal. Nobody would expect me so it would be perfect.

amanda said...

i would love to guest star on SVU. i dream about it. and i'd want to play the bad guy. {or girl}

but in real life? my loud, distinctive voice would give me away like whoa!

♥ Tiffany ♥ said...

stabler would be my weakness for sure. id do a crime or misdemeanor if he would interrogate me lol

but really, my hair is like yours and sheds and id be caught in.2 seconds

Allison M. said...

I love Elliot Stabler.

I think I could get away with a few crimes like illegally parking for sure.

*~Dani~* said...

I also shed hair like crazy. My DNA is all over this state, and probably others!

your wishcake. said...

Hahahaha! You are seriously adorable! And I would hand myself right over to Stabler, too. I'd be all, "Um, pat me down? No?"

:)

I love how you're all, "My hair sheds like crazy!" That totally made me giggle.